“The first glass is for myself, the second for my friends, the third for good humor, and the forth for my enemies.”

“Next to power without honor, the most dangerous thing in the world is power without humor.”

“In truth, politeness is artificial good humor, it covers the natural want of it, and ends by rendering habitual a substitute nearly equivalent to the real virtue.”

“It never seems to occur to some people, that, like beauty, a sense of humor may sometimes be fatal.”

“I don't need someone with a hot body. He can be fat or overweight and have a belly. It's very much about style and substance and humor, interest, curiosity and really being smart.”

“We are, in the comics, the last frontier of good, wholesome family humor and entertainment.”

“Negative humor is forgotten immediately. It's the stuff that makes us feel better about our lives that lives long. Much more satisfying. Enter children's books.”

“Comedy has to be based on truth. You take the truth and you put a little curlicue at the end.”

“Humor distorts nothing, and only false gods are laughed off their earthly pedestals.”