“I'm not good at normal things. I can't drive a car. I couldn't read till I was 10.”

“At least 50 times. I've jumped off a building, jumped off a cliff in a car. I've been in bedrooms when women came in with knives and guns.”

“I'm not gonna ride home in the car. I'll wait for Randy. I think I'll get home quicker.”

“I'm gonna be the best dad that ever lived. I'll have a ranch with a race car track and a golf course.”

“Men are superior to women, for one thing they can urinate from a speeding car.”

“I've spent more on my Dodger tickets that I did on my car.”

“I like the guitar better these days. I like the bass, too, but it's hard to fit a bass amp in a small car.”

“I think we're getting to the point where everyone's getting fat and everyone's getting allergic, or claims to be allergic to something and people can't walk from their front door to their car without a bottle of water in their hand because they have to hydrate every three and half steps.”

“I've already established my (political)machinery. It's like a car. It's fixed already. You just have to get in and drive it.”

“I'm carded for R-rated movies. And I get talked down to a lot. When I try to go rent a car or buy an airplane ticket or other stuff adults do, I get 'Okaaaaaay, honey.' I remember when I was 18, getting crayons in a restaurant.”

“The best car safety device is a rear-view mirror with a cop in it.”

“If a movie is really working, you forget for two hours your Social Security number and where your car is parked. You are having a vicarious experience. You are identifying, in one way or another, with the people on the screen.”

“Many highly intelligent people are poor thinkers. Many people of average intelligence are skilled thinkers. The power of a car is separate from the way the car is driven.”

“My mother was determined to make us independent. When I was four years old, she stopped the car a few miles from our house and made me find my own way home across the fields. I got hopelessly lost.”

“Well, honey, I had the million dollar houses, I had the car, I had the horse, I had the barn I had everything. Was I set free? I didn't even know what that meant.”

“You can know or not know how a car runs and still enjoy riding in a car.”

“Design can never be an ultimate explanation for anything. It can only be a proximate explanation. A plane or a car is explained by a designer but that's because the designer himself, the engineer, is explained by natural selection.”

“Have you ever noticed how nice people are at the car wash?! Maybe it's just me, but it makes me happy. Weird, I know!”

“The first time I rode a bike I was four or five. I crashed into the back of a car.”

“I always loved music. You know, my parents said I started singing when I was 4, in the car.”

“The United Nations four or five years ago put out a study that said the meat industry, meat-eating, growing meat for food is the No. 1 killer of our planet - not No. 2 or No. 3: No 1. You know what's No. 2? Transportation. Everyone thinks that No. 1 is transportation, and goes out and buys a hybrid car. Screw the hybrid cars. Don't eat hamburgers.”