“Definition of a Statistician: A man who believes figures don't lie, but admits than under analysis some of them won't stand up either.”

“Definition of Statistics: The science of producing unreliable facts from reliable figures.”

“America believes in education: the average professor earns more money in a year than a professional athlete earns in a whole week.”

“America believes in education: the average professor earns more money in a year than a professional athlete earns in a whole week.”